Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in markiv1111's LiveJournal:

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Wednesday, September 17th, 2008
4:48 pm	Typewriters, and maybe some other stuff I think somebody will remember that a couple of years ago I did a fairly lengthy post about why I need a typewriter to write my fiction. (Does anybody even remember that back in the mid-1980s I had a few short stories in print?) Thanks to tigertoy, jolest (whom I had a phone conversation with) and skzbrust (who had been my landlord and housemate, not to mention that he and I had been in the Scribblies together) for getting it. It boils down to this: When I try to write fiction on a computer, I write, rewrite, and rework ad nauseam the same page over and over again, finally giving up and *completely* losing the idea so that it can never possibly be finished or see print. When I use a typewriter, I frequently wind up with a completed story. The last eighteen years have really been somewhat restful. I came away from the 1990 Clarion writers' workshop with a feeling that came out kind of like this: "I know I will never write fiction again." I put a few stories already written into the mail and did a little bit of touch-up, but (for all that there were two false starts a few years into this stretch) the Nate who had once been a writer was just *gone.* There were a number of factors leading into this. James Patrick Kelly, the visiting writer the first week, who had said to me on his way out, "I'll see you in print," had also said to the group that the most important thing any of us could do would be to get a computer with a word-processing program, as it was the only way any of us would achieve his or her full potential. At this point, I started to believe ("realize") that being a writer was simply not for me. Things went from bad to worse over the following five weeks, and the stresses in my day-to-day life did not relent during Clarion, but rather, got even more extreme. At the end of the six week workshop, I would very nearly have left my right arm behind rather than deal with any more stress. Note that I did not use a computer during Clarion, but rather, rented a typewriter. I had a great time with the typewriter, doing 27 pages worth of rewrite on one glorious day, turning out numerous pages of hard copy and five (? I think?) short stories. For me, this was exactly how it worked, and there was no reason it could ever work any other way. Note that I do know of two top writers who, for at least a stretch in their careers, insisted on typewriters. Harlan Ellison is one; I am quite sure that he is still sticking with his manual typewriter. Piers Anthony used a typewriter up through the first seven Xanth novels, though he finally got a computer with a Dvorak keyboard (note that I am not clear on what this is) to do *Golem in the Gears* (the eighth Xanth novel, and one of the better ones). I can hear people saying negative and hateful things about Harlan, or saying about Piers, "Why should I possibly care what machine he uses to write his drivel?" Note that I feel quite cordial to Piers as a person (he was a regular correspondent of mine during my adolescence) and found some of the Xanth novels far better than the misplaced snobbery of some of my friends would give them credit for. Even so, the general vibe has been: "Nate, we don't want you to emulate Harlan Ellison or Piers Anthony. You're smarter than that. If you want to accomplish anything at all, you need to get a computer." So here I am. I spend most of my time with this computer and don't do fiction, but at least, I'm not certifiably crazy, the way I would be if I used a typewriter to do fiction. It has looked over a period of years as though my going from using a typewriter for everything, and writing a new short story every few months, to using a computer and writing no fiction whatever, was considered to be a net gain. Things have changed. Last week Louie bought me a typewriter. It is an Olivetti, and I think the model is Lettera 36A, or something like that. It is currently in the shop for a minor problem with the way the ribbon was installed, and also a general cleaning and servicing (as it was used). I am not sure how I feel about writing fiction right now. (I finally trashed my Adler typewriter about four years ago when it turned out that it was no longer possible to get parts for it.) The ideas I have in my head are all mainstream fiction, not s-f or fantasy at all, and I don't know anything about mainstream markets for short fiction. But at least it is now a possibility, and maybe I have rested just long enough. In any event, I will keep you posted. (signed) the writer formerly known as Nathan A. Bucklin. (43 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, September 11th, 2008
11:34 am	No gig.... I had finally pinned my hopes on one band I would very much have liked to gig with on lead guitar. The band is called the Dixie Hicks (not to be confused with a national act, the Dixie Chicks) and bandleader Duane Stombaugh (keyboards, electric bass) is an old friend of mine whom I had played some gigs with about 20 years ago. They are a seven-piece country show band who don't work quite as often as my last band worked, but get top money when they do work. I had been hoping that at some point they would need a new lead guitarist, as it would have been great to work with Duane (who had also told me that at some point he might want to go back to full-time bass, and would I like to be the band's regular keyboard player?) It also turned out/turns out that they are planning on recording an album soon and are very interested in my material. I went by Duane's place, I think eight days ago. Duane was not convinced that I could play authentic country guitar. (He is somewhat of a purist.) It turned out that I could play country guitar just fine. The first thought of Duane and band members was that the guy who auditioned right after me (known as Dusty) would be a better overall band member because of his much stronger lead vocal than mine, but that I was a strong second. While Dusty was setting up, I grabbed the Martin acoustic that Louie and I bought from Gordy Dickson's estate and, with Duane's encouragement, played them three more-or-less country originals: "We Might as Well Stay Together" (on my third tape, *Butter Side Down*, "Even Trade" (only on the out-of-print first tape, *The First Overnight Guest,* though lately Louie and I have started playing it at parties) and the one song of mine that everybody agrees is country and many people think would be a smash country hit, "I Can't Get Over You, So...." (why don't you get under me?) One member of the Dixie Hicks is a woman named Greta, fiddle and harmony vocals. Duane considers her essential to the band. Greta was mortally offended by "I Can't Get Over You, So..." and said she could tell that I was a completely sick person as soon as I sang, "I miss the way my hand feels as it slithers up your dress," and the rest of the song just proved how sick and twisted I was, and that if Duane were to offer me the gig, she would quit. That is where things stand right now. I asked Duane to pass on that "I Can't Get Over You..." is a song *ridiculing* the guys who would come back for an instant replay, not glorifying them, and that if I heard a song glorifying that kind of behavior, I would probably be offended too. Duane (who has no problem with the song) said that he would pass it on, but don't expect this to get results, as Greta appears to be completely inflexible. So that is where things stand right now, and I have no idea when my next musical gig (with any band) would possibly be. I am heartsick and despondent. And if I got away with playing the song for 30 years, I don't know where this one strongly held opinion came from. (Note that Kathy Mar, who didn't get the "this song is a song of ridicule" vibe, was also offended, but not this dramatically, and she and I remain cordial.) The only remotely positive thing is that somewhat later on, the same day, another old friend bandleader called from Tennessee to let me know that he was still working on selling his house down there and that he would be very happy to come back to the Twin Cities and gig with me. I wonder if the Federal takeover of Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac will help him with this. But both financially and personally, I need *gigs* -- and the sooner the better. Nate (29 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, September 7th, 2008
4:37 pm	Ketchup comments (yawl understand me?) (1) Finances are tense. I ran my ad on Craigslist again. No calls from working bands. I am hoping that the old friend who is currently gigging as "Johnny Pineapple" (and his Waikiki Wildcats) or "Cannonball Paul" (and the Gandy Dancers -- doing a set of songs about trains) will start to land the gigs he is talking about. Louie would not be comfortable if I were to go into all the details (and I'm not sure I'd be comfortable either) but things aren't good. (I'm talking about the finances, not Johnny/Paul -- good man and good friend, but it may take a while for this avalanche to start rolling no matter what Johnny/Paul does to get the first snowball down the hill.) (2) I am getting addicted to political polls. I wish they would all say the same thing, maybe the same "positive" thing so I could relax. The Gallup poll has McCain significantly ahead of Obama (48% to 45%). Several other ones have Obama ahead. Whom do I believe? How does one get the facts? (3) Louie and I went out last night -- kind of in celebration of her birthday (which is actually tomorrow. Her birthday and mine are 28 days apart, so they are always on the same day of the week). A dear friend/musician named Bill Much has a band called Jamm Jarr. They were playing last night at the Shamrock on West 7th Street in St. Paul. To my pleasant surprise, two other people from Bill's and my old band were there together with wives -- drummer/lead vocalist Jay Krepka from the Time Travelers with wife Kathi (whom I'm not even sure I talked to -- didn't mean to be rude) and bandleader/rhythm guitarist Jim Smith, with wife Carol. Good to see all four of them, and the band, which is not as tight now as it will be in a couple of months, still shows a *lot* of promise. I'm not going to "friends lock" this, and if the owner of some club googles for "Jamm Jarr" and finds this post, please hire them with my blessings. Louie and I definitely had a good time. (4) There is some stress associated with my day job, in that I have to work about 25% more hours to get even close to as much money as I made working 6 hours a day at my old day job (HealthPartners). The Aetna insurance we have is far more like *not* having insurance than it is like having insurance, but I (as most of you know) had a recent case of prostate cancer and this is not even remotely a time to give up and be uninsured. There are signs that the worst (financially speaking, although this may be true health-wise as well) may be over, but it will still be just great if I can start playing regular gigs again. I hope all is well with you, whoever you are who reads this. Hang in there and work as hard as you need to, and I hope you get the results that are right for you. Nate (13 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, August 13th, 2008
5:11 pm	Politics I almost never talk politics. I have my opinions. I would rather not waste time defending them or discussing them. Things just get too tense. But -- the last few days I have googled for the words "political polls." And I keep looking at the numbers for Obama vs. McCain. Maybe in three to five months the nightmare will be over. We can hope. Nate (a staunch liberal Democrat) (19 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, August 11th, 2008
12:51 pm	Birthday Thanks to lsanderson and the madblonde for remembering that it was my birthday and wishing me a happy. (Still is my birthday -- 12:52 p.m. on August 11. I am 59.) I was (and am) thinking of writing a relatively lengthy post about things learned this year, but I have work to do right now on my day job, so this can wait. By the way, the gig on funk keyboards (Saturday and Sunday night) went extremely well. I didn't play anything fancy, and missed a bunch of notes on Saturday (far fewer on Sunday) but it worked reasonably well. The bandleader is working on some "midi" stuff that, if it works in the studio, may very well mean he doesn't need a keyboard player at all, but if not, there may be another date or two in the works. Nate (22 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, July 22nd, 2008
4:03 pm	How many updates? There has been so much to ramble on about. (I type notes sometimes for one doctor who has a serious Spanish accent. I am okay with this as when I was living in South America, we had a whole lot of people around us who spoke English with Spanish accents. He has been known repeatedly to refer to patients as "a ramblant historian.") To mention: 1. Sprained ankle. I am really pretty well back to normal. If I walk on it just wrong or stand at an angle that is a little "off," I can get some pain out of my right foot and ankle, but there is no point in doing this; I'm 98% back to normal. 2. Recovery from prostate cancer radioactive seed stuff. My testosterone is as low as it can be and still be considered normal. Previous to the surgery, my testosterone was right smack dab in the middle. My urologist/urologic surgeon, Dr. Stein, said he would not prescribe me a testosterone patch, but if I really felt that I had the symptoms of low testosterone (and I do) I should talk to an endocrinologist. I don't know if I want to do something that major, right now, especially since I'm not in a position to take an hour or two off from work to see a doctor (as I do not get paid sick time). 3. House stuff. One of our upstairs rooms, known as the "east room," was set up to be an office about seven months ago, so I can do my day job up here. We set up a major heating/cooling unit, with a drip tray. About a month ago I noted that a few garments left up here from when Louie and I had been sleeping up here (during my mother's visit, as we gave her the bedroom) were still on the floor, and sopping wet. (Yes, I am that bad a housekeeper; Louie is considerably better, but she views this room as my space, which it really pretty well is.) It turned out that the floor underneath them was also wet. I had seen repeatedly that the drip tray was only half full. I had *not* noticed that because of the location of a spout, the drip tray cannot get more than half full, and the spout had been pouring excess water onto the carpet for some time. So we tried doing different things with the placement of the heater/cooler, and putting towels on the carpet and walking back and forth on the towels to sop up excess water. We had made considerable headway, but then the problem recurred (nowhere near as bad, as this time I was paying attention)and we had to try different things with the heater/cooler, putting it up at a height so we could put a bucket where the drip tray had been, etc. It turns out that the heater/cooler was dripping in several locations besides just over the drip tray. (There is one bright side to this, just barely: It means the soggy carpet was not entirely my fault.) We tried several things, and now have the heater/cooler on a board, with the same old drip tray in place; but it is already too late for the seam where the floor meets the wall, as mold has begun to develop. I knew being a homeowner would be difficult. I did not realize that things that had never, ever happened to me when I had been a renter would come around and bite me in the throat. So in any event, I don't think we're in any position financially to tear the carpet and the wall out and get rid of the mold that way; but I will be pouring out the drip tray on an hourly basis, to keep things from getting any worse. I think I am going to make two or three different posts right now, as I have several different topics. I have never yet used cut tags and don't actually know how to do so; it may just be a bit easier for me to "friends lock" some stuff. But this will be public for now. Note: There are a few people who have friended me whom I don't know. (I'm pretty sure who emi is --we have at least one good friend in common, and that spelling is a little unusual.) I would appreciate your telling me who you are and why I should friend you back. I don't think there's anybody out there I would be hostile toward, but my friends list has gotten big enough for the total size to be difficult to deal with. N.B. (12 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, June 5th, 2008
4:56 pm	Rainstorm, and do we hear tales of tornadoes? The rain has hit over here with a vengeance. My computer is plugged into a power strip, so the risk is considerably less than if it were plugged right into the wall. Nonetheless, lightning just hit a tree in front of our house, and the power went out in my area for a while -- just plain jet black here up top; getting around only by feel. I remember Glen Campbell reminiscing (on the old Johnny Carson show) about growing up in a house with no electricity. "We had to watch TV by candlelight." And then Johnny responded with a comment about playing "kerosene guitars." I am sitting here thinking about the implications of my typing doctors' notes in the dark -- no fun at all. (Joke.) And we need to get my mother to the airport in about two hours, for her to get back to Seattle. Some people probably don't consider driving in the rain to be that big a deal. There certainly are worse things -- I have seen roads in total blizzard/whiteout conditions that are excellent reasons for staying home. Nonetheless, we have enough rain right now to affect the grip my tires have on the road. I will need to be very careful indeed -- not that I'm likely to be washed away, but there's still a risk. More later if anything comes up that is truly necessary to discuss. And I am going to go back to my day job. Nate (10 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, June 1st, 2008
2:17 pm	Mowing of lawns I have been wondering, lately, and it is more than just an abstract need to know. I am not in physical shape these days (with my sprained ankle) to mow my lawn. The front was done by a neighbor, but she did not tell us that she was done when she finished the front part but did not do the back. Is there anybody on my friends list, or an acquaintance of someone on my friends list, who wants to make a little money mowing our rear lawn? How much would you charge? (On one hand, I like the idea of the mowing gig going to somebody who is unemployed and really needs a bit of pocket change. On the other hand, this is hardly necessary. And maybe there is a 12-year-old kid in your neighborhood who mows an awful lot of lawns, is raking in the spare change hand and foot, and doesn't "need" the money but is also very good with lawns.) We have a hand mower but not a power mower. Our phone number is six one two, eight two seven, seven one two one. By the way, a weird thing happened lately with our phone number. Louie and I have been getting occasional pieces of mail addressed to "Lowes" Bucklin. It turned out recently that the phone connected to my dictaphone system, a phone we virtually never use except as part of my dictaphone, has been listed in the Minneapolis white pages as the only phone at this address, and registered to Lowes Bucklin. Outside of the fact that Louie's first name is actually Lois, please do not use this phone anyway -- the one above is the one that works for us. Please call if you want to mow a lawn, or know somebody who does. Nate Bucklin (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, April 16th, 2008
1:09 pm	Retarded? I had an interesting experience at the downtown library a couple of months ago. I went in looking for a bunch of the Walter Farley "Black Stallion" books and related ones (like the "Island Stallion" books -- not tied in with the other series, but just as horsey.) Note that when staying at the Roper's place almost a year ago (was it that long? Must have been) I saw that in the room where Bill and Gretchen had Louie and me sleep, a small book called *Big Black Horse* -- an attempt, and a quite reasonable one, at simplifying the basic *The Black Stallion* novel for a second- or third-grader. I read it cover to cover in about ten minutes and went to sleep. In any event, the woman I talked to at the information desk immediately decided I was mildly retarded (as best I can tell). Note: Those of you who know me in person (all but a few of you) know that I have just a touch left of my childhood stutter, and sometimes, particularly when I am trying really hard to slow down and make a point, there is a bit of hesitation, sometimes associated with a serious word-finding difficulty. I have also had people decide upon talking to me that I had to be gay. There was a stretch when I considered this to be a compliment (my list of gay friends include some wonderful guys and a couple of women) though at this point, it's more like addressing me by my brother's name rather than my own; however well or badly meant, it is still a case of mistaken identity. And it is a sad, sad state of affairs that there are times when someone assumes I have to be gay and that person believes that he or she is being insulting -- making it all the harder for me to focus on the positive aspects of the mistake. However, this time, it wasn't complimentary at all. The woman got a list of books by Walter Farley and tried very, very hard to steer me towards *Big Black Horse*, trying to make it very clear indeed that this was more my speed and that I simply didn't have what it took to read the original version, or any of the related books. I had to be very firm indeed about my needs before she was willing to help me with the original books at all, and even then, one could tell that she had serious doubts about the help. One could see/hear her thinking, "It's nice that this Bucklin guy knows what a library is and even what a book is; but I would be derelict of duty if I did not guide him toward books he could actually read and enjoy." It did cross my mind that I could seriously play games with her head. "A lot of people think I'm retarded, but I'm really not. I took one of those I.R.Q. tests a couple of years ago, and the nice lady said I passed. And I can sign my own name now and everything!" (Much later, it did cross my mind that I could tell her that I was a permanent resident of the Minnesota State Home for the Bewildered.) But she wouldn't have realized that I was joking, and it would have made it that much harder for me to get the books. (I ultimately checked out 10 or 11, on two consecutive trips -- never saw that woman again.) Right now, I'm waiting for a call back from my day job's "Support Center." I was unable to type a couple of notes on account of an unusual error message; when I tried to go all the way out and then back in, I was unable to get back in. I don't like this at all, as when I don't work I don't get paid. But perhaps the problem is that a dozen, or two dozen, or whatever, people all called. Nate (16 Comments |Comment on this)
Friday, April 11th, 2008
11:49 am	Perfect pitch and stuff The big news on my "perfect pitch" stuff is that I have got it back. This took a *lot* of work, both internal and external. What it looks like, is that some 20 years ago or thereabouts, I was sick for a few days, came out of the illness with my ear off by about 1/4 step (quite standard for me, back then, when I was not feeling well) and, instead of readjusting, just let it go. But to intervene for a second, this is a scene from a bad movie played in my head, that someone (perhaps pied_piper70) is on the opposite side of the screen from me. "Nate, I am your friend. Nate, you have perfect pitch. You always have had perfect pitch; you always will have perfect pitch. Now I am going to walk up to you with my hands outstretched. And I want you to give me the gun. Are you listening, Nate? Can you hear me, Nate? I want you to give me the gun...." (Does somebody out there with a voluminous memory for old movies have a recollection of a scene like this in one such movie?) (And Peggy O'Neill said, "No, Nate, you don't want to give anybody the gun. But you do want to give them the hammer you keep hitting yourself in the head with.") It was extremely difficult. I couldn't just decide to do it, any more than a color-blind person can just decide to see colors. I had to start with the songs where I knew exactly where the notes were (notably "She Came In Through the Bathroom Window" and "Hey Jude") and gradually move over until I could tell for a *lot* of songs -- and at some point, after my sweating blood over it for a couple of months, found out I could tell for any song. I would hear something on Louie's and my boombox (which lives in the same room as our electric keyboard), figure out what the root of the keynote chord was (a matter of two seconds or so) and go over to the keyboard and play that note. I never missed, and there were 13 or so in a row that I got perfectly. I did find myself, when I played back music recorded in my head, having to readjust things by about 1/4 of a step to make them come out right. And there have been a few times when I would hum a note that on a gut level felt like A, but which I knew when I concentrated was about 1/4 step down from A, I would hum the note I heard and then readjust my voice up about 1/4 step to where I *knew* it was an A. Louie, who has been completely unsympathetic, rags on me just a bit when she hears me do the 1/4 step adjustment, as she knows why I am doing it. Little stuff includes: (1) This actually happened a couple of months ago, back when my band the Time Travelers was still a going concern. I put some new strings on my Carvin bass and tuned them up to where I was pretty sure it was right. I made no attempt at checking with my electronic tuner, knowing that when I got to the gig I would be in tune with my band's two guitar players. I was right. (2) John Fogerty (originally from Creedence Clearwater) did a lengthy and excellent show on channel 2 recently. He used a variety of different guitars. There were two songs (one of them "Bad Moon Rising") where I could tell easily that the guitar he was playing was tuned down a full step (two frets) from concert pitch, and two frets down from the guitar he had played on the previous song. (3) A question for pied_piper70. I said that I did not need to check with my book of Beatles scores to know that *She Came In Through the Bathroom Window* was in A, or "Hey Jude" was in F. How is this relative pitch rather than perfect? On the down side, I still get very slightly better results from my electronic tuner than I get tuning the guitar completely by ear. (Recently I tuned it by ear; three strings were just barely sharp, three others just barely flat. This is not compatible with either "Nate has perfect pitch" or "Nate has relative pitch." It does, however, confirm that electronic tuner technology has come a long way since its infancy.) I have auditioned for a couple of bands of late, and have not heard back. I am most hopeful about an audition this coming Monday; the gig is on keyboards, and I am not a great keyboard player, but it sounds as though they have not been able to find any keyboard player at all. Let's hope. And I will see some of you tonight at the con. Nate (5 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, March 27th, 2008
9:47 am	Minicon Can somebody help me out with either street addresses or e-mail addresses for Keith Malgren, Matt Strait and Andra? I need to do some very serious thank-you letters to some good people for an utterly wonderful convention. Minicon -- Louie and I had planned so solidly to make it out on Thursday evening, but did not do so (and wound up missing out on what would have been a very welcome chance to have dinner with the other guests of honor and the concom). Friday, Saturday and Sunday we made music; then Monday, after saying I would not do so, I stopped by the post-post-con party for a while and am glad I did. I got into a lot of good conversations with good people, and tried very hard to be in a frame of mind where I would stop and talk, not just keep on running to the next item on my agenda. This did turn out to be under my conscious control, and the conversations kept on being warm and intense. Sunday would have been the highlight of my con in so many ways; I have always enjoyed the Sunday night music parties, but there were a lot of people missing -- throat too sore, or just generally feeling too "out of it" to want to keep partying. And there are some people I am starting to wonder if I'll ever see again -- Bob Berlien and Kathy Routliffe from Chicago, Krissy -- I could make a longer list but won't. Even so, the music was real and warming. The programming items I was on (the songwriters' panel, the guitar workshop, Louie's and my joint concert) all seemed to go quite well, and I am going to suggest/request of Brenda Sutton (Louie's and my contact at ConTata, where she and I will be joint guests of honor) that I be given a time slot for a guitar workshop there as well. It's always the same guitar workshop; I haven't run into enough of my former workshop attendees at any given con to do a "workshop, stage 2" at all. Even so, it's fun, and nice and intense. I was also pleased that a lot of people who had never previously praised Louie's and my music together came to our concert and said very positive things afterward. She and I had played very little music together over the alst eight months or so, but there was no question but that we got it back. On a totally different note, I am about to start trying to watch my weight. When I was first on Lupron (the drug that makes people stupid, but knocks out the testosterone and makes prostate cancer more treatable) I gained ten or fifteen pounds. Just in a couple of months before Minicon, though, I had decided just to cut down my food intake and not necessarily finish everything on my plate, and maybe snack a bit less. This resulted in a four pound weight drop over about a month. If I can keep losing four pounds a month (not likely, but a nice goal) that would have me back at my "trough" weight (196 pounds) in 5 1/2 months, and happily so. Another thing to note is that now that I am working at home, I do not need to look nice to impress co-workers and supervisors, so I have been letting my hair grow. Sometimes it is tempting to imagine that I have 20 pounds worth of hair, so when I get to the spot where I am exactly 20 pounds heavier than I want, I will get a haircut and promptly be at my goal weight. But this is imaginary. It would be nice to grow it long enough to get it styled really classily; we will see if this summer is so hot that I want it just chopped, or if the opportunity for that styling might come up, in which case I shall do it. So much of this is just little stuff, and, were I to keep writing, the ensuing paragraph would be lesser stuff yet. So I will close. Nate (9 Comments |Comment on this)
Friday, March 14th, 2008
1:51 pm	Posting on general principles This will probably be a bit short, but I do have a question. Louie and I are starting to plan for a six- to ten-day trip next December or so (waiting till I have been at the day job for over a year, which is when my paid vacation kicks in). Places we are considering start with Eleuthera Island in the Bahamas (significant because when we were last in the Bahamas a few years ago, we talked about making this side trip and made the mistake of not going), but I have mentioned Jamaica, the U.S. Virgin Islands, and Puerto Rico. I mentioned Santa Catalina Island (outside Los Angeles) only to rule it out; there isn't enough there to keep us busy for that period, and Los Angeles is not a place for the kind of relaxed mellow vacation Louie and I have in mind. Also, I think Catalina has a lot of camping, but no hotels. I am a bit nervous about the classic hotel, where one sits in mass-produced chairs on a typically American balcony and sips martinis, but there is probably someplace a bit more local and charming in most of the places. The questions: Where would you go for a vacation? Have you seen any of the places we have mentioned? What do you think about getting to San Juan, Puerto Rico, renting a car and driving around the island? Where would you go in December, that is warm and inviting? Now that you have seen some clues as to what Louie and I are looking for, is there someplace similar enough to please us, but different enough to be even more worth the trip? (All of a sudden, I'm thinking about renting a car in Miami and driving to Key West. But there are probably at least half a dozen similar places and better ideas.) Is there some quasi-tropical place that has a science fiction convention that month? (Note that I am only about 10% interested in actually doing this.) Right now, to give you the update: I am recovering from the prostate cancer surgery with an ongoing low-grade prostatitis, but even so, it is a recovery, albeit slow. I still have no new band and will probably wait until after Minicon to look hard and heavy for one. Also, right now I am very seriously congested; my nose feels as if it were plugged with concrete. Afrin nasal spray helps, but one is not supposed to use this for more than three days (maybe a bit more because I have been using it only once a day, rather than every 12 hours). Louie and I had been talking about my releasing an entire CD of Windham Hill style acoustic guitar playing, but on a gut level I have been responding really negatively to this idea and, no matter how honest I try to be, I cannot figure out why I don't just plain want to do it. A little weird one: Some years back, when I was still writing for Stipple-Apa (if you don't know what an apa is, please ask), I asked my friends what their blood type was. I got the expected wide variety of responses. (Mine is O negative.) However, nobody had A negative blood, and nobody had type AB at all. If you are in either of these categories, please let me know. This has been a bit brief. I look forward to hearing from you, and perhaps I'll have a bit more time in a week or so. Nate B. (20 Comments |Comment on this)
Friday, February 15th, 2008
2:59 pm	The raise The first thing I want to mention is this: I have been at my current day job less than four months. And I have already gotten a raise. When I first talked to Faye (in charge of the company, though her sister, Jan, is my direct supervisor) I mentioned that I was happy to have the job, but the pay rate did strike me as a little low. Note that in other day jobs I have had (the first one ever just maybe being an exception) either the job was unionized, or I was planning on staying there for only a year or so in any event. So for me to ask for a raise either wasn't necessary, or wouldn't solve the actual problem. In any event, Faye agreed (!!!) and said that after I had been working for her for three months, we could discuss a raise. A few days ago, I sent Faye an e-mail memo stating several reasons why I felt them giving me a raise would be a good idea, and perhaps the only fair thing. I tried very hard not to be too manipulative, and I especially wanted to back off from the typical petty blackmail (if you don't give me this raise, I will look for other work). Nonetheless, I made a few good points. Faye e-mailed me the following morning. They had planned on giving me a raise of about 7.15%, but on consideration of the points I had made in my e-mail, they had decided to give me double that (about 14.3%) instead, and apologized for waiting until I had e-mailed them, rather than their simply notifying me that the raise was coming. I feel very, very good. And I also feel as though I am a very effective communicator. Actually, I am not going to discuss anything further right now. More tomorrow, or in a few days. (I am out of work for the day. Louie and I need to do a little laundry, and then I think I will go to my gig and set up early.) Nate (21 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, February 6th, 2008
9:44 pm	Perfect pitch This is, in many ways, a response to the other half of a conversation I had with pied_piper70. pied_piper70 said, "Nate, what you have is relative pitch. What you are discussing is relative pitch. Perfect pitch is what you have when somebody plays a note and you automatically know what it is." (Note that this is a quasi-quote.) Well, pied ol' boy, the thing where somebody can play a note on a reasonably in-tune instrument and I can identify it is exactly what I had from about age 11 to my late 30s or early 40s. My 6th grade music teacher, a Mr. Weaver, played 35 or 40 notes on a piano. I recognized all of them up until the end, when I got a little rattled and was a half-step off on one. But I can see how pied_piper70 might have decided that I was talking about relative pitch. And the up side of all this is that I am working very hard, with a lot of success, on getting the absolute stuff back. I think the problem was that I was thinking, "The edge is off my perfect pitch. It will never get any better. A lot of people lose their perfect pitch as they age. I don't want to be different, so I will admit that I, too, am losing mine." A stepping stone I was thinking of using (and may yet use) was that if I could think of a song where I knew what key it was in, and could always call that song into my head, then I would have perfect pitch for the chords in that song. (My pitch sense has been primarily trained to listen to chords, from about age 16 on.) The first song I could do that with for sure was "She Came In Through the Bathroom Window," off the Beatles' *Abbey Road.* The song is primarily A to D, back and forth, although the chorus starts out with A to D minor. (Note that I have not played along with this record on a well-tuned instrument, or any instrument; I have not looked it up in our book of the Beatles' scores. I *know.*) Result, now that I have this song locked in: Any song with A or D chords, or A and D bass notes: Immediately recognize it. Any song whose bass notes, or for that matter melodic notes, are on an A scale or a D scale: Two seconds or so. I play it against "She Came In...." and I know exactly where it is. A song whose chords, bass notes, or melodic notes aren't on the A or D scale (like songs in D sharp major): Three or four seconds, concentrating. Then I will get it. I think a case could be made that what I am doing is *mimicking* perfect pitch -- but if I can still get the chords and the notes in a matter of seconds, I don't think it makes that much difference. (Something I am wondering about and would like to discuss with others with perfect pitch, or even *almost* perfect pitch, or perfect pitch under some circumstances: Do you have a set instrument in your head on which the idea C, or the ideal A, is played? Do you think of the grand piano at home that got tuned every six months? Do you think of the sound of your high school choir, warming up for that first a cappella fortissimo on your favorite song of theirs/ yours? Or do you have just a very firm, yet ethereal, idealized sense of where each note is?) In any event, I am trying to get more than that one song absolutely locked in. "Hey Jude" is in F -- no need to check it; I *know*. I tried to come up with songs in A flat or B flat, and wound up with two songs on which I had played. Kate Worley's "Rhythm Blues" on the album *Omaha the Cat Dancer* by the Shakers is in A flat. "Starmaker," off my own *Water Over the Bridge* album is in B flat. I will always know where those two songs are. So the question is: At what point do I say, "I've got my perfect pitch back?" And is it cheating to have perfect pitch for four or five notes, and use them to get relative pitch back to the other seven or eight? Note that this is still a work in process. I did hear a song on the radio a couple of nights ago (the very, very lame "Land of a Thousand Dances" by Wilson Pickett) and at the time could not tell if it was in D or D flat, though back in the house I became quite sure it was D flat. But most of the time, these days, I know exactly what key something is in. And if I had not been (briefly) wrangling with pied-piper70 (a superb musician, and someone I hold in absolute respect) I would not have been getting it back at all. So I would like to get feedback from pied_piper70 himself, and others who I know have excellent ears -- asimovberlioz (someone else who is a far better musician than I will ever be) and figmo (who, I found out many years after she and I traded a couple of letters, is a filker with perfect pitch -- correct, figmo?) and markbernstein, who sings a cappella very well and gets away with it, meaning he knows pretty much where he is as he sings. At what point do I stop saying, "Perfect pitch for a couple of notes and chords, relative pitch for the rest" and start saying again, "I have perfect pitch?" This post will end now. More later. By the way, my band (The Time Travelers) is totally defunct, even canceling gigs we had booked. I'm going out Friday night to hear Sonny Winberg, a country singer and sometime bandleader who may need me. Nate B. (14 Comments |Comment on this)
Saturday, January 5th, 2008
3:34 pm	To touch base, and little else My friends should know that I am doing fine. I had an x-ray and an ultrasound done, and the radioactive seeds are exactly where they are supposed to be. If and when I can get around to it, I have at least one really long post (maybe more than one) and a song lyric. The problem is that I use the same computer for LJ that I use for my day job, making LJ posting look paradoxically like work. Louie and I have some errands to do today, so will close this off. Nate (12 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, October 11th, 2007
6:38 pm	Yeah, right, still more I am having my prostate cancer radioactive seed implantation surgery on the morning of Tuesday, November 6. This will be early in the morning; I expect to be in the hospital through about noon on Wednesday, November 7, but things could change. "Nervous" --? Yeah, an understatement. But it will be better than the life I would have had if it had never been treated. Thanks to all for all kinds of supportive statements. (And again, to my friends who have not commented on this situation -- you are still my friends. I'm not sure I've really left anything for you to say to me, in any event.) Great songs, continued. As soon as I realized that one of my major gaffes was including only songs that had been written in English, things got even crazier. Note the French songwriter Jacques Brel. I have only "Jacques Brel is Alive and Living in Paris" -- and no doubt there are numerous other ones. And other French songwriters. But there are some great ones here. "Old Folks" - on this one, I would recommend Michael Johnson's version on his first album, *There Is a Breeze.* And you may remember that my first serious paying of attention to songcraft came when I was a child in Rosario, Argentina. Note the fourth verse of "La Recordada." "Cuando la luna se quiebre en el monte and llene de luz mi soledad. Habra un beso perdido en la noche, buscando tu boca para descansar." When the moon breaks on the mountain and fills my loneliness with light, there will be a kiss lost in the night, looking for your mouth to rest. And the third and sixth verses of "La Siembra" (the first song I heard El Conjunto Folklorico Infantil Albor Gaucho play, the night they sat in at the Club Martin Fierro). Note that it is standard for the third and sixth verses of an Argentine zamba to be identical. "Soy tierra que anda, sombra que canta; memoria de la semilla que en arbol de sangre se levanta." I am earth that walks, shadow that sings; memory of the seed that rises [or perhaps "raises itself"] on a tree of fire." Yeah, I was a Dylan imitator at one point; but with poetry like that in the background, you don't *need* to imitate Dylan, as the bar was set so high in the first place. And in classical music? There are a whole lot of people out there I think would like *Carmina Burana* -- the one classical piece that, to my thinking, matches up to your favorite rock albums on the rock albums' home territory. Favorite songs (I call them songs; people like asimovberlioz and other classical musicians may call them something else) include "Omnia Sol Temperat," "Estuans Interius," "Olim Lacus Colueram" (a challenging piece for a lot of amazing tenors), and "Circa Mea Pectora." I never quite got into the other two in that cycle ("Catulli Carmina," "Il Trionfode Afrodite" -- and I am doing the best I can with the spelling) but Carl Orff is a genius just based on "Burana." There are arias (operatic songs) in some operas that are knockouts, but it has been very rare over the decades that I've been able to sit through a whole opera (I mean recorded, as I haven't been to a live opera show since I was 10). I am thinking, though, that I may want to buy a copy of *The Student Prince* and listen to it all the way through two or three times, maybe even in rapid succession. And how about Gilbert and Sullivan? In any event, there is so much to talk about, and so many of you mentioned interesting possibilities. We are individuals, yes, with individual tastes; but in many cases, we aren't all that far apart. Special appreciation to dsgood, for mentioning the songs in the long-standing traditional folk area. Yes, they lasted for a reason. Likewise the best Christmas carols. How many of you have at least read, if not heard, the third and fourth verses for "It Came Upon a Midnight Clear"? Love to all of yez, as per my usual. I am starting my new transcription job. It is better than the old one, at least for me. And now to go downstairs and fix dinner. Nate B. (13 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, September 30th, 2007
11:59 am	Favorite songs I didn't respond to a comment dreamshark made, some months back, because I got the cancer diagnosis so soon afterwards that I didn't really have time to process the comment. I had said something about a song having had a tight bass and drum part, and dreamshark (who had been wondering all along if I hear the same things when listening to music that she, and my other non-musician friends, hear, or if for me it was really different) jumped to the conclusion that it was at least a possibility that I heard tight bass and drum parts as paramount, and didn't hear what others might think of as being just the song. Actually, first and foremost, I hear the song itself (a vocal line backed up by guitar or piano playing chords) to be paramount. I did read somewhere that professional musicians don't even use the same side of their brains to listen to music, but I can't feel what the difference would be. To me, if a song doesn't work with only the vocal and one instrument playing chords, the song probably doesn't work. Note: There are some songs where you *have* to have either multiple vocal parts -- Crosby, Stills and Nash's "Suite: Judy Blue Eyes" and most of the rest of that album are examples) or perhaps multiple instrumentals just to make the song sound like itself. Two well-known Rolling Stones songs have some minimal, but important, fuzz lead guitar parts; I am referring to "Mother's Little Helper" and "Satisfaction." (Quite likely there are a number of other Stones songs that also have such parts.) And a lot of Beatles songs rely on two or three vocal harmonies. Last night, driving home from a gig, I heard "Love Me Do" on the radio. About 2/3 of this fine song is two-part harmony. I think "Love Me Do" would work better without the harmonies than "Mother's Little Helper" or "Satisfaction" would work without the fuzz guitar parts, but it's not an "either/or," and nobody is ever going to use a home-made tape recording of one of these songs to sell them, ever again. Note that songwriters are advised to record their "demo" tapes with only one voice and one instrument, preferably piano; the producers and song-sellers want to be able to use their own imaginations, as far as what the song will sound like when one of their artists performs it on a CD (or tape or vinyl). Now, having said all that, can I make some notes, some comments, on favorite songs? I did make a list of what i felt were the greatest 20 songs of all time, some years ago, but lost the list. And there are some things that I am far less certain of, now. Dreamshark and I were in agreement that songs on an "all time" list should be songs that were important at the time they were released, not just songs that we heard while growing up and wanted to make a big deal about. She and I were in agreement about Woody Guthrie's "Roll On, Columbia." Another that tends to show up on "best" lists is Billie Holiday's "Strange Fruit." And the question is, of the people who were alive and listening to music when those two songs were recorded, how many of them could and would pick another song that had been powerful or influential before either of these was recorded? In any event, because I don't have other songs to add to my short list that were from that time period or earlier, I can't even remotely claim "all time" status. But to get into specifics: My top 5 are "Crucifixion," written by Phil Ochs, also recorded by Jim & Jean. Note that I recently found a Jim & Jean CD (containing this) at Cheapo Records. This song is a blockbuster, with imagery, alliteration, and power. The Jim & Jean harmonies make their version triumph over Ochs' own. Note that my top 5 could be in any order. Also noted: "Lily, Rosemary, and the Jack of Hearts" by Bob Dylan; "Stranger with the Melodies" by Harry Chapin; "Corey's Coming," also by Harry Chapin; and "Poisoning Pigeons in the Park" by Tom Lehrer. Funny songs (most of you would know that I've written some) can be even more challenging to write than "mainstream" songs; if it simply isn't funny, you don't have anyplace to hide, though I seem to have gotten away with it with "Even Trade," with a humorous 1st and 2nd verse and a 3rd verse that is less so. So what would I do, to fill out my next 15 songs? I acknowledge the greatness of the Beatles; the three songs of theirs I like most defensibly (at least I hope it's defensible!) are "Here, There, and Everywhere" (Paul's favorite of his own songs), "Something" (by George Harrison, the second most often covered Beatle song after "Yesterday") and "The Fool on the Hill." I realize that "Yesterday" sold more copies and was covered by more artists, but I have little choice but to insert my own taste here. I like "Yesterday" well enough, and maybe it does belong on the list around 24 or 27 or something, with numerous other fine Beatle songs to keep it company, but I like the three I named better. Other great songwriters and songwriting bands? Yes, yes. Stan Rogers? "The Mary Ellen Carter," "Free in the Harbor," and "Lies" -- no question about any of these. Can I name three or four favorite Grateful Dead songs? "Cassidy," "Mississippi Half-Step Toodaloo" (noting that I prefer fredcritter's version to the band's actual versions that I have heard), "Ripple" (whose words don't work very well as poetry) and "Sugaree." I have heard albums by Grateful Dead lyricist Robert Hunter, and some of his solo stuff works very well without the band, but I can't name specifics at this point. And continuing to go in that direction -- the Rolling Stones are considered top rock'n'rollers, but their songs generally aren't covered the way Beatles and Dylan songs so often got covered. I would give "Mother's Little Helper" and "Ruby Tuesday" the nod here. Note that "Ruby Tuesday" is at its best when one hears the Stones' version; for instance, the recording by Melanie is utterly awful. I am quite fond of "Waiting For a Friend," but am not familiar enough with the lyrics to know if it rates an equally high position. Obscure album cuts that I may have heard, did hear, but you probably haven't, and have no idea why I'm picking these obscure cuts? "Any Guy," by Melanie -- a blockbuster that has worked repeatedly for multiple musician friends of mine, from different areas of music. "Since the Last Goodbye," by the Alan Parsons Project. If somebody had played it for me and said it was an obscure Paul McCartney song, I would have believed it, and considered it one of McCartney's best. "What Became of Mary?" by Every Mother's Son-- written by an 18-year-old songwriter, and very, very moving. I can play this for you at the next music party, if you want. Noting that the top 5 songs are all quite a bit longer than the usual two and one-half minutes a radio song would probably get, what other long songs do I like, partly because of their length, but more specifically because the extra length gives the songwriter a chance to cut loose a bit? Put in some more Dylan -- "Tweeter and the Monkey Man," as recorded by the Traveling Wilburys. "Desolation Row" -- an 11-minute song, but each verse works really well; I think Dylan knew he was on a roll, and just didn't want to stop writing. More Harry Chapin? "A Better Place to Be" is wonderful, a good story and moving; I can't put it near the top of the list because it's actually two different pieces of musical songcraft, linked by a shared story, and therefore doesn't work as a unit quite as well as the first two I named. "Odd Job Man" -- humorous, but also a completely convincing character portrait. "Vacancy" -- with the understated parallel between the motel man's vacancies, which lead him to rent the vacant rooms and earn his living, and the vacancy or emptiness in his life. Shouldn't I include something by some of my other favorite songwriters -- Tom Paxton, Shel Silverstein, Bill Staines? Note Paxton's song about acid rain, "There's Something Wrong With the Rain" -- excellent. I'm also fond of "Annie Took me Home." My favorite Silverstein is serious, not his usual humorous stuff; the title is "The Last Morning," but though it is very well written, I can't help but think I am responding as positively a I am because it so totally described my own situation as I was ready to leave Los Angeles and come home. (Note that the city in the song has subways and L.A. doesn't, though.) A lot of Staines' work is a little spotty, but two that would go high on the list would be "River," and "Flowers in the Snow." Both of these would go below the three Stan Rogers songs I named. More humorous songs? Lou and Peter Berryman are so good at this that it would be tempting to make a long list. I would pick "Squalor" (and it's all because she didn't eat her vegetables) and "A Chat With Your Mother. (We sit down to have a chat, it's F-word this and F-word that.) Also, "Madeira, M'Dear?" by Flanders and Swann is one of the finest jobs of lyric writing I have ever heard, though I give the recording by the Limeliters a bit more credit than the original. I am a songwriter and hang out with other songwriters. Which of their works are deserving of topnotch respect? "The Visit," by Steven Brust. "Deliver Me," by Andrew Calhoun (and it is a crying shame that the album containing this is out of print.) "At the Edge of the World," by Howard Ashby Kranz. Isn't this list a little short on 2 and 1/2 minute songs that could be, or have been, played on the radio? Yes. I will throw in "Operator" by Jim Croce, and "Mr. Dieingly Sad" by the Critters. There is also a song by the Statler Brothers, considered country but very short on country cliches, called "The Class of '57." This wasn't played on the radio stations most of you listen to, but it was played on radio stations. One more note to Dreamshark: If you like a song that has a nice, tight, bass and drum part, working together well, you are probably liking it at least in part because of the nice tight bass and drum part, even if you aren't currently really conscious of it. At some point (if I ever throw a "disc jockey" party) I may want to play you "Could I," off the first Bread album. There is a lot going on here that isn't just vocals and chords. I do respond to some songs of this sort, but I would generally put the Stan Rogers, Beatles, etc., up above them, though "Could I" is certainly "good enough." Another song off the first Bread album (which works far better musically than a lot of their later stuff, the later stuff being more bubble-gum) is the very sophisticated "Friends and Lovers." This song, like about half of the other songs on my list, works quite well without the original band, though I have only heard one local band play it live. This has gone on long enough. I'd be thrilled to hear from you, on this topic or whichever. Nate Bucklin (16 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, August 14th, 2007
2:48 pm	A car, and a few other items Louie and I have a new car, but also have some questions about the old one. The other car in our two-car family, a 1992 Ford Taurus originally bought for Louie's mom (who has since passed away) is actually quite a good car, in quite good shape, but the air conditioning absolutely does not work. It can be recharged for a few days, but then the leak conquers all. Louie and I will need two cars for a while anyway (as my training for the new job involves my going up to Elk River, every work day until the training is completed -- three work days? Ten work days? It depends on how well my fellow trainees and I do) but the questions I have are these. (1) Is anybody here in town likely to need a car, maybe in a month or so? How much are you planning on spending? (2) Would you be interested in a car whose air conditioning does not work and would cost $1500 to fix? The car is probably only worth $750-$800 at best in any event. And if you're local (Twin Cities metro) and might actually want this car, go ahead and shoot me an e-mail. But I'm betting there are a whole lot of people out there who know more about the selling and buying of autos than I do, who can grab the conversational ball and give me input. The new car, btw, is a 2000 Toyota Corolla, white, with 30-35 miles per hour gas mileage, and in very good shape; I will be happy to share it with Louie, once we've decided when and how we're going to cut back to one car. Alierajean and I had a brief discussion a couple of weeks ago. I had mentioned that there had been one point where I'd wanted just to drop everything and move to LaCrosse, Wisconsin. She pointed out wisely that "the geographic cure" (assuming a change of scene will fix everything) in her experience usually doesn't work. I do know about this for alcoholics -- changing cities will get you away from your drinking buddies, but you'll still have bars, and will meet new drinking buddies, and things won't really change. (I've never had a drinking problem, but a lot of my friends from my Adult Children Anonymous days were either members of Alcoholics Anonymous or have parents or siblings who are such members.) My own problem, though, hadn't involved drinking, but a feeling that I was in a scene that was getting really, really destructive. (And at this point no need to tell me I was overreacting. Yeah, perhaps I was; but those were my own honest reactions, like it or not.) And LaCrosse, as far as I know, has no fan scene at all, so my environment would be different as soon as I arrived, and would remain different. So the question of all of you would be: Have you ever tried a "geographic cure" for something that ailed you? Did it work, totally fail to work, or somewhere in between? Have you found that the social differences between a milieu in one city and a superficially similar milieu in a different city trump the similarities, so that moving on really did make a difference? And if you've moved from a much larger city to a much smaller one, or vice versa, did that make a difference that can easily be interpreted as the result of the size differences? I have a feeling that, even having made two posts in one day, that I'm omitting something that I really wanted to talk about. But for now, let's post this. Nate Bucklin (23 Comments |Comment on this)
11:51 am	Stuff First of all: Having found out that billroper and daisy_knotwise will no longer be dealing tapes, having sold only 15 of them last year, Louie and I realized that something could be gained by putting *Resolutions* onto a compact disc. However, many of you know that I like my discs to be as full as possible, and *Resolutions* is only 58 minutes or so. I would not be transferring *Butter Side Down* to a compact disc, as it is not a strong enough piece of work. However, I would appreciate feedback from those people who already have *Butter Side Down*: Can you name three or four, or even one or two, cuts from this taped album that might go on *Resolutions Plus*? (There is another possibility. The handful of you who have my original 1985 tape, *The First Overnight Guest,* will remember that this tape started with six pieces recorded with "full studio," with drums and keyboards, as well as my usual bass and guitar. It might just barely be possible to edit out some of the clicks and snaps from "Something Going On Tonight" and "Words Don't Cover It" to get these onto *Resolutions Plus,* but then I'd still need two or three more cuts off *Butter Side Down* to fill it out.) And then there's yet another possibility: that the master tape for *Resolutions* isn't clean enough to transfer to CD in any event. Billroper and daisy_knotwise are dealing with her health problems right now, and with an infant daughter whom daisy_knotwise can't lift, but they will likely be checking in a couple of months to see if this is possible. But it won't hurt to have soem idea in advance which extra songs would go onto a tape that would become 72 (or 71 or 70) minutes rather than 58 or so. I'm going to watch the noon news. More in a bit. Nate Bucklin (19 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, June 21st, 2007
3:52 pm	Work stuff A dear friend, both on LJ and in real life, said once that it is really stupid to quit a job when you don't have another one lined up. As a cancer patient, it's all that much more important to me to keep my insurance. Even so, though, I am so close to just walking out the door here at the downtown St. Paul HealthPartners office. The people here are great; the layout (with quite typical cubes) is a bit Dilbertesque, but livable. The work needs to be done. However, I'm needing to realize that there are things for which my mind works, and things for which it doesn't. Back in high school, I got straight A's in chemistry and physics on the paperwork -- and consistent D's and F's (and I think at least one of the D's was a gift grade) in the lab. I can do a lot of "paperwork" kinds of stuff and am even getting back my old arithmetical skills. But claims examiner stuff is beyond me, and I am quite sure will always be beyond me. I've had two different experienced examiners tell me they needed two years on the job to get comfortable with it. My patience will not last two years; in fact, I'm not sure it will last two more weeks. So I'm going to focus on things I can do, and when I go out to apply for work, be realistic. I have strong verbal skills and know medical and legal terminology, and type quite rapidly, and can do some proofreading. Beyond that, I shouldn't even pretend. And I am starting to look forward -- perhaps a bit too much -- to going out and knocking on doors. Yeah, I should get a haircut first, and maybe another white shirt or two, and play the game. But I also think I can probably interview better now than I could 25 years ago. We'll see how many doors I need to knock on, to get results. And it's also easy to focus on the two upcoming Guest of Honor spots. I am thrilled about both, but the nearer one (fan GoH at Minicon) is quite likely to lead me to write a fairly lengthy post, talking about (among other things) why I'm still here in the Twin Cities, rather than having moved somewhere else. And why I appreciate so many of my friends as much as I do. In any event, being on LJ with you is good too, and we will definitely be in touch. Nate Bucklin (12 Comments |Comment on this)